Phantasmagoric Waltz

"Hey Karkat." Jade perked her eyes open.

There wasn't much to do in an empty laboratory. Some screens blinked with an "Error" sign, perhaps some broken tubes lied within the floor, and some deteriorated chairs stood there. You could only hear the sound of some vague typing and rare giggles from time to time. They were alone, too. Sitting on a dirty blanket they found on one of those strange drawers. "Gog, I can't believe you are sitting on that." She was asleep at the time, or used to be, at least, until her head began hurting and Karkat offered his lap for her to rest in. She was sure he meant "sleeping", but who would waste time in that when a stubborn, grouchy and cold troll offers you his lap to put your head on?

"Karkat, listeeeen!" She said a little louder this time.

He moved his attention away from the computer and looked down to where Jade was.

"What is it, now." He flicked her forehead. Jade squealed.
"You know... we should dance!!" She smiled and said, straight to the point.

Karkat stared at her for a moment, not really knowing how to react.
"What?" If this was a prank then it was a god, so really awful one.

"You know. Dance. When we move at the Rhythm of music and all that!"
She stood up and flicked his forehead back, making Karkat grunt. "Come on, stand up." He frowned in annoyance. What the hell did she want? First of all, the only "rhythm" there was at the time was this typing he did, rarely, even.
Second, and more importantly, he didn't feel his ass. Why would he want to stand up? He'd just get on his legs to fall down once again. Third, even if he wouldn't say that one, he was pretty much okay with Jade's head on his lap. Fourth, she flicked his forehead. It wasn't that much of a precious forehead, but what the hell.

"So that is why," he went on, "this is the worst idea you've had after that "let's go explore the veil" one." She groaned.
"Buuuuut, Karkat! What are you doing there anyway?" She said, taking his Grubtop.
There was a single dead conversation with Tavros. Jade facepalmed.

"Stand up."
"Don't want to."
"Stand up, jerk."
"Not happening, idiot."
"Asshole."
"Imbecile."
"Fuckass."
"Bitch."
"Karkitty. ♥"
"Since you asked. You are fucking getting it.

He stood up and began charging towards her, as she started running away as well, giggling. While Karkat pointlessly threatened to "kill that huge dork-ass of her", she laughed uncontrollably just because of the situation. Before he realized, he could feel his ass again and was perfectly standing up. Jade stretched her hand out to him, with a silly yet daring look on her face.

"Come at me, Bro!!" She declared. If Karkat hadn't been focusing on what the fuck she was doing, his hand would have gone literally straight through his face. He decided to ask instead, though.

"What the fuck are you doing?"
"Inviting you to dance!" She cheered.
"How am I supposed to be even do that."
She laughed and grabbed his hand.
"Uh."
"See, we hold hands like this, the other one goes-", she grabbed his other hand, and wrapped it around her waist. "-like this!" Karkat's face was a big mix of rage and blush. "Isn't this what you retards call... uh...", she finished his phrase, "A Waltz!"

"..."
"Yeah." Jade answered his silence.
"There's no music right now, idiot."
She looked at his Grubtop. There was no way he would let her get on it, no matter how she begged, thus she came up with another certain idea.

"I'll sing."
"Great, first you make me stand up and then you torture me. Thanks a lot, Harley."
"Ugh! You're so rude. I'm not that bad at singing!! See." She hummed a little choir.
"That's terrible. And not even singing."
"Why don't YOU sing instead, then?"
"I don't want to dance in the first place, god, why are you such an autistic girl?" She stepped on his foot. He stepped on hers back.
"Ouch! Don't do that."
"You did first. Not my fault."

She stopped talking and began thinking.
"Then let go."
"Yes, sure. Stupid."
"No need to insult me!!"
"Sorry then."
"Gosh, you don't even mean that!"
"Oops, then?"
"Just..."
She pushed him, without letting go of his hand. He reacted in pushing her back as well, but without letting go of her waist either.

"Heh. See, you danced." She grinned mischievously at him. He blushed and opened his eyes wider.
"That was not dancing at all."
"It SO was, don't deny it!!"
"But I just pushed you, god."
"Dancing is like that, just more gently!"
She pushed him again, but this time, as she explained, in a more gentle way.

"God damn it. Fine." He muttered and grunted, while following her.
She started singing a silly beat, 1, 2, 3, and so on, as she moved her feet back and forth, trying to get him to follow her. She stepped on him suddenly, though.

"Fuck." He cursed, and stepped on her back, but missed.
"Heheheh." She tried stepping on him again, but failed, since he saw it coming and dodged like you do when you aren't really staring down.

It wasn't exactly their intention, but anyone seeing that would have thought that they were actually dancing a piece of waltz. Inexperienced, but fair enough.
Karkat sighed and faced up, just trying to follow the lousy, stupid, god damn out-of-tune rhythm that came out of Jade's mouth.
It was sort of relaxing, now that he thought about it. Jade's voice wasn't that bad, and the steps were really simple. He looked down when Jade leaned her head on his shoulder, still emitting the idiotic melody.

"Are you going to sleep now or something?"
He said, annoyed. Jade frowned at him back, and sighed.
"No, silly! I'm just... err." She blushed slightly.
"Just??" He demanded.
"Jesus, Karkat, You're even more clueless than John, aren't you??" She stepped on him. "No, I know what you're doing, dumbass." He grinned.
"I just want to know where you're going with this."
She gasped and hit him with her free hand.
"God, you're such a tease!!! Really."
So they kept going, without saying a word. It was fun, now that he thought about it twice. To casually step on her when she was away on her strange imagination, or to stare at her when her eyes were closed. They gradually started to become better at it, and stopped making the, of course, "on purpose" mistakes they sometimes happened to make. He smiled when he saw Jade smile. When she wasn't looking, of course.

He was curious, however, to know where this was going. Jade wouldn't answer. And he thought troll girls were complicated, gosh. Karkat sighed and poked her cheeks with his nose, just making sure she wasn't singing asleep.
"Jade??" He poked again. "Did you actually fall asleep now?" She stopped singing and opened her eyes halfway, then opened them wide open in... well, absolute surprise.
"No- whoaWAIT that's too close!!!!" She nearly jumped in embarrassment, and kept her head away from him.

"Jegus Jade, calm down!! You just fall asleep randomly sometimes, shit, what am I supposed to think??" He sighed and began humming the song she was singing before and had stopped. Jade began giggling. Karkat flushed madly and realized what he was doing. "Shit. Harley you bastard!"
She began laughing out loud.
"Oh my god I can't believe you were singing!!! Hahaha, oh god, this is just amazing."
He bumped his forehead against hers.
"Shut up! God damn it, this is your fault."

She stopped laughing slowly and stared into him. He glared and stared back.
"You're so grumpy, Karkat." She muttered.
"And you are such a dork." He growled back.
She began singing again, but started to go lower and lower, since his head was not going back into position.
"What are you doing??" She asked, bothered. He sighed and began imitating her.
"Nothing, silly! I'm just... err." He said, imitating his loud, girly and dorky voice. She stayed quiet, with her alien eyes wide open in disconcert. He grinned and kept going. "Jegus, Jade. You're even more clueless than Egbert, aren't you?" She blushed abruptly and stepped on him in an almost reflex-like reaction. But then she saw, how they weren't even dancing anymore.
"I think I asked you where was this going."
She stuttered, "Y-yeah. You did."

"So?"
"I don't know!! I mean we are some sort of couple, right???" She blurted out, then gasped at her atrocious declaration, still red-faced.
"Uh... yeah well... I thought that was clear, right?" He blushed, once again.
"Yeah, uh...", she said, "couples are like...", she waited for a little.
"Like?", Karkat asked. She continued, "Supposed to, uhm, kiss, right?"

He looked away. Then looked at the other side, trying to avoid that god-so-freaking-serious look of her. "Didn't we already,.... uh."
"Yes, but couples do it all the time!"
"What should I know? I've never been in an actual, real relationship, gog."
He confessed.
"I figured."
"Fuck you."
They both just stared at each other with annoying, then angry, then flushed, then god-so-angry once again looks. So she began singing a different song, although.

With more dedication, they began dancing. This time Karkat faced down more often, along with Jade looking up back. They were a couple, technically. So why not?
Nothing wrong with flirty ambitions.

"I think your buck teeth are pathetic." Jade sighed and kept on looking. "And...", he breathed, and kept going, "Strangely adorable." He coughed and looked away, still facing her.
She kept humming. Once more, it began to go lower, and lower. Their noses nearly touched, both with indifferent yet embarrassed looks on their faces. The music was nearly gone, too, but they kept on dancing. Karkat's nose was almost touching below Jade's eyes now, and he was beginning to feel the tension. What if she pulled away?
Their lips were so close now he could just... god, no, he couldn't. Then again... there wasn't any music nor dancing anymore, so...

So he just let go of her waist, held her face up and kissed her.
With his eyes closed so hard, god you have no idea. If there was something Karkat wanted to see in that moment, it had around 250 teeth and was starving to death.

Jade suddenly heard the noise of a certain application. A person was pestering them.
She couldn't help but grin and start giggling while Karkat tried to "be a couple".

But her laugh was contagious and Karkat began giggling as well. Apparently, a kiss being awkwardly interrupted by a messenger program was a very funny thing. So they just laughed out loud at each others mouth, and bumped their heads while trying to control their childish laughter, not even caring about who was pestering either way.
After a while, they went back to sit down in that indecent blanket and spoke about pointless and idiotic things.

Almost as if that dance had loosen Karkat up.
Jade suddenly remembered something.

"Hey... Karkat?" She began.
"How do we get out of here?"



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Karkat just closed down the Grubtop, so he never actually thought about reading what had interfered their loving moment. No one really did, actually.

-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] --

GC: H3Y K4RKL3S
GC: WH3N YOU F1ND YOUR W4Y H3R3 CAN YOU T34CH US HOW TO D4NC3 TOO??
GC: >:]